Office jargon may be getting out of hand and it could hurt you

Office jargon may be getting out of hand and it could hurt youOffice jargon may be getting out of hand and it could hurt youConfused unintelligible language. Obscure and often pretentious language marked by circumlocutions and long words. A literary device Aliya used to reach essay word counts in high school. These are just a few ways that Websters Dictionary defines jargon.But what exactly is office jargon? Not only are dictionary definitions the cop out of writing introductions, they are also inadequate descriptors when trying to fully grasp the beauty and magic of office jargon. Thats why I took it upon myself as the keeper ofCareer Contessas Instagramto reach out to you, ur readers, to hear what you have to say about yur favorite or most frustrating office catchstichworts.So without further ado, here are some of my favorite submissions- phrases that had me saying, Will coworkers notice if I start using this all the time? or, That persons office culture seems interesting. and eve n, I just cant. Im taking the rest of the day off.Lets take this offlineSubmitted byMiranda Grueiro, Continuous Improvement Leader, andKirby McLaine, Digital StrategistWhat Does It Mean?This is one of the more common phrases heard round offices across America. It means, the thing we are talking about right now has gone off topic. A courteous way to say, lets move on. Perhaps Mirandas definition is a little more straightforward Lets shut up and talk about it later with only the people we need to. K. Thnx.Whats to Love/Hate?This phrase saves time in a meeting when someone goes off topic. It can also carry a little sass. But as Kirby mentioned, when used face-to-face, the offline reference becomes pretty strange. How do you take something offline, when you werent online to begin with?When Is It Appropriate to Use This Phrase?Use when the conversation has drifted for more than a minute, and others in the team are disengaging.Theres lots of fur flyingSubmitted byLulu Says, Freelance Writ er/Content ProviderWhat Does It Mean?I had definitely never heard this one before. Turns out itdoesntmean, I accidentally let out the flying squirrels that we weirdly keep in our office. Itactuallymeans, theres a lot going on right now or things are getting hectic.Whats to Hate?Lulus train of thought was similar to mine. She dislikes this phrase because of the horrible imagery. She cant help but visualize someone juggling hamsters- which is probably not the best mindset to be in when things are hectic around the office. Wheres Lulu? The deadline is coming up Please dont tell me shes thinking about hamsters again.When Is It Appropriate to Use This Phrase?From Lulu Never. Ever. Dont do it. Unless its faux fur. And even then, no. Put the hamsters downFUSubmitted by Anonymous, Executive AssistantWhat Does It Mean?This was one of those phrases that really just seemed to be specific to this submitters office. FU is short for the phrase that we wereallthinking, follow up.Whats to Hate?Ill let the submitter take this one 1. FU does not mean follow up. I think we can all agree on that. 2. Theres often talk about the youngest generations in the workforce (specifically, millennials) ruining communication. There are complaints that we cant write in full sentences or with proper grammar. In my experience, were not the guilty party. I work in a generationally diverse department, and no Millennials are using FU, thx, or c u later in emails.When Is It Appropriate to Use This Phrase?I really dont feel like theres ever an appropriate time to have a public FU block on your calendar. Also, getting an email that says I wanted to FU with you about Mondays meeting is a little jarring.Pull the leverSubmitted byJasmine, Supply Chain AnalystWhat Does It Mean?Pull the lever means to go forward with a project, to initiate a task, or to finally make a decision on something.Whats to Love?From Jasmine I love it when a task is expected and I am ready to execute. I hate it when my team is a ssessing risks and we have to make a decision. Then it feels like Yzma from The Emperors New Groove is pressuring me to PULL THE LEVER KRONK, and I might fall into a pit.When Is It Appropriate to Use This Phrase?You can use this phrase when you want to signal that its time to move forward. Or like Jasmine said, when its clear that a path of action needs to be made.SlickSubmitted byAllison Cherry, Marketing ManagerWhat Does It Mean?This also seems to be one of those unique-to-their-office phrases. At least, it was new to me. Heres what Allison had to say I often hear colleagues outside my business unit (absatzwirtschaft) call brochures and sales sheets a slick. Its their way to define a piece that has been formatted into branded design layout with relevant product/service information.Whats to Hate?From Allison I despise slick because it truly has no meaning within marketing. Its not jargon marketing experts use. Its something those who work outside marketing have decided is a fun, ho t phrase for marketing. Slick is an adjective, not a noun. Stop making up your own words and call what youre talking about a brochure or sales sheet. Insert extreme eye roll.When Is It Appropriate to Use This Phrase?In Allisons opinion, the appropriate time to use this phrase is never.Mea CulpaSubmitted byTessa Nicolas Arias, Interpreter/TranslatorWhat Does It Mean?Mea culpa is the Latin way to say, my bad. Because we all know that Latin is the most relevant way to speak in 2018.Whats to Hate?This phrase frustrates Tessa because the way she sees it, people will get the point when you apologize for something being your own fault in English, no need to involve Latin. If theres a simpler way to phrase it, by all means, do it. It seems like this can be applied to most office jargon.When Is It Appropriate to Use This Phrase?From what I gathered, the most appropriate time to use this phrase is when you are taking the blame for something, but maybe you also want to slightly throw off your coworker. What were we talking about? You made a mistake? All I remember is that you speak Latin and that makes you interesting and cool, Aliya.TLDRSubmitted byJennifer Goebel, Regional Operations ManagerWhat Does It Mean?TLDR means Too long didnt read. It signifies that whatever is written is too lengthy and the reader did not invest the time to read it. As Jennifer defines it, TLDR is a thoughtful SparkNotes version of your email.Whats to Love?TLDR sums it all up. Its all of the best/most importantinformation, packaged into a one or two sentence, Ill-take-the-time-to-read-this gift. Jennifer put it best In a world where your inbox overfloweth with information TLDR is our saving grace. Blessed be to TLDR.When Is It Appropriate to Use This Phrase?TLDR Use this phrase when you need to make long things short.Double ClickSubmitted byReggie Hanson, Customer Success ManagerWhat Does It Mean?To ersatzdarsteller click means to dive deeper into a subject. Zooming in or unpacking a topic as one would on the computer.Whats to Hate?Personally, I semi-ironically love this phrase because I had never heard it before. This just seems like a phrase that someone would make up if they were asked to come up with some fake office jargon. For Reggie, its the opposite. He dislikes this phrase because its overused. Many of these types of phrases are the equivalent of short guys buying giant trucks and just trying to elevate a conversation.When Is It Appropriate to Use This Phrase?When you are trying to double click an icon on your computer. Loud and clear, Reggie.Thank you for making it this far into the articleSo there you have it. A few of my favorite office jargon submissions.To be honest, there was only one or two of these that I had heard of before. After lets take this offline, it took a hard turn into the obscure and never circledback.Nonetheless, I hope you learned something today. I knowImlooking forward to using these incessantly around the Career Contessa office. And Ill keep you updated on whether I still have my job next weekThis article was originally published on Career Contessa.